Once again, the weeks have flown by and Little Bear is now 10 months old. It's been a bit of an unsettled month for her as separation anxiety has hit with a bang and she often gets hysterical with fear if I leave her even for a few seconds. It's very wearing but, gotta be honest, there are times when it makes me feel super loved and special.
The separation anxiety has made our nights a bit trickier recently as when she wakes up she gets very upset at being alone and won't go back into her cot without a fight. We've had a few nights this month where LB has been awake for two or three hours in the middle of night refusing to go back to bed. The last week or so has been better though so hopefully we're coming to the end of that! We've been very successful at our plan to stop rocking her to sleep and she'll now go into her cot awake for naps and let us leave her until she falls asleep. Naps have become pretty easy lately which I'm thrilled about because it gives me more time to do housework (ahem, watch TV) while she's asleep.
LB's eating has picked up a bit recently too and she's dropped a day time bottle and replaced it with a snack which is encouraging. This month she's been a particular fan of mango and strawberries and she's also started to get the hang of eating meat. We gave her a chicken drumstick a few days ago which she attacked with impressive skill!
Little Bear is still a very little bear indeed and now weighs 16lbs 8oz, putting her on the 9th centile. I was actually quite surprised when I went up to weigh her as she's looking much chubbier and has definitely grown in the last few weeks so I was expecting her to be heavier. She's now wearing a mixture of 6-9 and 9-12 month clothes and I often look at something I'm about to try on her and think it looks massive, only to find it fits fine.
The major milestone this month has been LB starting nursery. It took many many visits to different nurseries and childminders to find somewhere we liked but we got there in the end and LB has been for a few sessions now. Being honest, nursery has been really emotional for me for lots of reasons: it's hard to leave her and I feel guilty for not staying home with her (which is silly, but it's hard to stop myself from feeling that way), it means I have to go back to work, and it kind of feels like the end of LB's babyhood. Now she has a life away from me. She spends her days doing things that I don't know about. Soon she'll have favourite toys and friends and staff members and I won't really know anything about them. It's a tiny step of independence for her and although it's a good thing, it does make me a bit sad that those months of maternity leave where we hung out all the time are over. I'm mildly annoyed with myself for getting all emosh about LB going to nursery because there have been many many days where I haven't enjoyed maternity leave at all, and even days when I've dramatically declared that I hate motherhood and am going back to work where PEOPLE APPRECIATE ME!!! God, Papa Bear has the patience of a saint, he really does.
I'm looking forward to going back to work in some ways, mainly because it'll give me something to talk about other than poo and nap schedules but there's no denying that it marks a new time of life for us with a new routine and new challenges for everyone. I'll let you all know how it goes - wish us luck!